Chinese New Year Eve

Mom and brother had school to go to. Dad and me left at home to clean up. Dusted top of cupboards, had battles with dust bunnies the size of my dog, and generally wrestled furniture to and fro while trying to get at the floor underneath. We do our mopping on our hands and knees, and while my lady tells me it's good exercise, it made the morning and early afternoon pure misery for me. Pretty Woman ran at least thrice on my laptop.

Late afternoon and early evening was taken up by reunion dinner preparations. The traditional steamboat preparations requires lots of slicing and dicing, but practically no cooking. Way cool.

Dinner was uneventful, marked by a brief tussle over the fan direction as well as the tv remote control. Won the fan direction tussle, on account of my brillant observation that any other direction will have the steam flying pell mell into somebody's face, thereby cooking it, which we want to avoid during a reunion dinner.

Watched more tv later at night, followed by an half-assed attempt to "shou3 shui4" (for the life of me I cannot imagine the English translation for this one. Usher in the Year?). Fell asleep a little after 1am. Too old for this stuff man...

Chinese New Year Day 1

Despite waking up early and presumably getting prepared earlier, Mom's temper still frayed around 11am, when foolhardy and gan cheong younger uncle called to rush us over.

Headed over to paternal grandfather's place first. Visitations here has been finetuned to an art. We arrive early, stay about 60 minutes, and hurry off before any other paternal relatives arrive. Relations have not improved over at least 5 years. Left a wee bit late this year, and almost met with one uncle with whom we have strained relations, to put it mildly. Mom stalked away in the other direction. That'll show him hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, even during Chinese New Year.

Headed over to maternal grandmother's place next. Thanked my lucky stars that it is a focal point for nearly all my maternal relatives, so that there's no need for 1,000,001 other visitations. Cursed bitterly at the weather. Vegged out at gram's place for the rest of the day, which was marked by intermittent visits from relatives, including those I meet once a year. My 2 year old niece was there to attract all attention, such that I am only asked once why my lady is not with me (I mean seriously. She has 6 places of her own to visit.) and why for the love of the fertility god I'm still single. Hah! Piece of cake.

Dinner was a minor fiasco. Good-for-nothing uncle showed up half-drunk and reeking of cigarettes and alcohol. Tried to shove food onto everyone's plate. I took 1 slice of tomato and ended up with 4. He must think I'm a demented rabbit. Grams came close to tears at his inebriated state, and my cousin Chelsea was almost baring her pretty teeth at him after being insulted at least thrice. The room was small enough such that others have to get up for those on the inside to move out. My brother refused to move out of the way, thereby trapping two cousins and me into sitting there twitching uncomfortably. Atmosphere was so volatile, you'd think we had Hans Blix over for dinner and were hiding WMDs under the table.

Returned home just in time to catch American Idol 4. Pretty standard stuff by now. The judges have to resort to losing their tempers to up ratings. Seriously. Methinks Paula needs to have a wardrobe malfunction. Randy and Simon can keep their clothes and pants on thank you very much.

Chinese New Year Day 2

My lady came over around 11. Suffering from some throat and nose problems. My dog, who usually barks at all and sundry who appears at the front door (excluding the four of us) took to her immediately once again. It really boggles the mind (This is not an insult, because I happen to be hen-pecked as well). I've had friends who come over frequently and still receive the royal treatment, from full-fletched "I'm-gonna-rip-your-kidneys-out" barks to guttural "stay-away-from-me-if-you-know-what's-good-for-you" growls. Nearly skewered by my mother because my lady's mom packed too big a goodie bag (how is that my fault you ask? Good question... the female's neural network is a mystery to us all). Nonetheless, she rallied well enough to return the favour, amidst killer glares which I valiantly ignored.

Drove over to my lady's place. Fixed her bro's mp3 player by banging hard on the USB connection. I think Roy's disappointed that he won't receive a new one. Had lunch there, and saw all manners of duck parts, including a humongous drumstick. Had a good laugh about how barbaric one looked eating it (guess who?). Let's see those SMU people handle it with their highbrow etiquette... Love her place, which is at the 11th storey and therefore extremely breezy. The only natural breeze at my place occurs when somebody farts or sneezes.

Went out to TM and caught Constantine. I can't believe she was willing to catch it with me and am foolishly touched. Haven't watched a supernatural thriller in eons. The last one was Dawn of the Dead, which I loved but my mates hated. The plebians. Enjoyed Constantine a lot. Gabriel was a riot- demented archangel who cannot decide whether to be a male or a female. I bet he/she/it gets lots of dates. The poor dear.

Bling bling was well received, and I got a swanky pair of cuff links which will justify some shirts from either Raoul or Zara. Somebody stop me before I have cause to liquidate what little assets I own.

Chinese New Year Day 3

Snore... ... ... Caught up on much needed sleep. Vegged out in front of laptop, listening to some crazed man rambling about protein synthesis, DNA, all manners of RNA from A-Z (actually there's only mRNA, tRNA and rRNA, in case you think I'm a brainless hick and am tempted to call me Cap'n Insipid). As stimulating as a funfair ride designed for an eighty year old with heart problems. Glad that I did not go into Biology and thereby self-destruct.

Chinese New Year Day 4

Caught up with primary school mates for a visitation to our Chinese teacher's place. Realized I forgot to bring along mandarin oranges and had to hop to Junction 8's NTUC to get 4. Felt silly. Crowded and rowdy reunion. We ate enough tidbits to resupply one mama store for tomorrow. Hopped over to Coffeebean @ Suntec to play catch-up with some of them. Shylene managed to avoid paying for drinks despite warning us not to be late, saying that those who are late will buy high class coffee all around (I have retained the evidence, Ms. Shylene, but may be bribed to lose it), AND being 15 minutes late. Grrrr. Needless to say, she got needled endlessly today. We then went to Moonfish Pasta and Seafood at Millenia Walk. Love their spaghetti carbonara. Never tasted better elsewhere.

Visited Raoul but no concrete plans to invest in any shirts as yet. Yes. Invest. At those prices and my kind of wallet, "buy" doesn't seem to carry sufficient import. Spotted gorgeous ones though.

Returned home to veg out in front of laptop, and started blogging instead of studying. I'm oh so screwed. Irritated because even now, the bloody idiots upstairs are singing, no, yelling, no, croaking, no, screeching karaoke. These inconsiderate, untalented, shameless retards ought to be visited by the friendly neighbourhood police...